Gold Keeper 2 iPhone game slash-and-burn fun

It’s odd that this iPhone game is called Gold Keeper 2. Sure, there’s a pile of gold in the middle of your dungeon floor that you’re ostensibly protecting, but it reminds me of when mid ‘00s Internet phenomenon “Snakes On A Plane” had been briefly renamed “Pacific Air Flight 121” before everyone realized that people just wanted a little honesty in a dumb action movie title for once.

Similarly, Gold Keeper 2 (99 cents) isn’t really about protecting your gold. It’s about being a demon and slicing and dicing your way as many people as you possibly can before dying.

Indeed, this might be the “Snakes on a Plane” of slasher iPhone games. The entire game takes place in one room, where you, angry demon, will attack bad guys (or good guys, I suppose, since you’re a demon) while a timer counts how long you’ve managed to stay alive.

As you stay alive during this gauntlet, you’ll get access to new weapons, but it’s not really made clear if one of them is stronger than any other. Ultimately, it’s just a new visual to look at while you’re beating up more dudes.

It seems silly to rate this so highly given it has almost no depth, and any replay value derived will only exist because you want to top your previous high score, but it really is a lot of fun to see how long you can manage to stay alive in your dungeon. It helps that the dungeon itself looks terrific. With grimy dirt floors that stain with blood as you murder your way through the game, Gold Keeper 2 has a terrific edge about it.

Sometimes a little edge and a shallow, addictive game play mechanic are all you need. There is obviously a time and a place for a deep and rewarding gaming experience, but for the other times, you couldn’t go wrong at all by picking up Gold Keeper 2.

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